It's a funny thing...

A hundred years ago, Jen wanted to work for the Boston Globe. Jen wanted to go to college, get her degree in print journalism and write brilliant articles for the Globe...maybe get her feet wet there and move on to National Geographic. Maybe screw all that and work for Rolling Stone.
But that was a hundred years ago.
One hundred and 10 years ago, Jen started writing. When she was 11 or 12, she saw the movie "The Paper". In one of those strange, life changing events, it made her want to be a reporter. And it's a really really good movie.
One hundred and four years ago, Jen started a newspaper at her high school because it didn't have one. A staff of five or six. One advisor. After school, almost every day. Hand cut and pasted. Copied on the school copier. Stapled by hand. Paper cuts. I loved doing it.
I went to college in Boston and went for print journalism. My professor for newswriting 101 was this huge, hairy brute of a guy. Big bushy red beard, tall. Informed all of us at the beginning of his first class that 20% of all students drop out. I understood on day 2. The guy was an ass. A brilliant ass but still an ass. He had an annoying habit of rubbing his huge hands together, the callouses making a weird, sandpapery sound, which would go on for almost an entire session. He was a writer or an editor for a labor newspaper in Boston. He was wholly intimidating. He was belittling. He was dreadfully honest. He wouldn't let you take ONE INCH. He made me regret wanting to be a reporter. He made me doubt myself and I freaked. I dropped my major.
Sometimes I forget about that time, a hundred years ago. It's a funny thing that triggers the memory, a memory of what COULD have happened, MIGHT have happened. A memory of something that has never happened. Deep down inside, as much as I think want to deny myself the thought, I still want to me the journalist. The reporter. The need to know and show. The desire to investigate. I enjoyed that time in my life. I enjoyed feeling that way.
This afternoon, I watched "Shattered Glass". As utterly disgraceful the whole Glass debacle was, it's an excellent movie. Peter Sarsgaard is fantastic in it...fantastic. I enjoy his acting. Even Hayden Christensen was. He can act. I was seriously doubting his abilites after Star Wars. If you haven't seen it yet, I HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend it. It sucked me in. Completely sucked me in.
Made me a little homesick for that time in my life. Made me a little homesick for what I could've done.