Tuesday, January 02, 2001

Happy New Year!
You know, and I know that I'm not the first one to say this, but 2000 went by way too fast. Where did the year go? It seemed like just yesterday it was summertime, and I was deciding to go to Keene State. Now, 6 monthes later, I'm a Keene State drop out, working at a good job and living on my own.
Had probably the most decent New Years I've had in a long time. Invited Nick over and Neil's ex-roomates ex-boyfriend, Jeremy, and his brother Joel showed up. We did the old-fashioned thing: got totally wasted and watched Dick Clark at 11:45, toasted at midnight...well, five after midnight because Nick couldn't get the Tott's open. : ) Called my parents and wished them a Happy New Year around 12:15, then drank some more and kicked everyone out at about four thirty.
How *exciting*. Do tell more.
I've been sleeping late this days on weekends. I'm not talking ten or eleven in the morning, I'm talking three or four in the afternoon. Today I got up at four thirty. I guess today was excusable since it is New Year's Day and I had a bit of a headache, but that doesn't excuse Saturday morning, when I got up at three o'clock. I also didn't move off the couch on Saturday. Neil and I laid around in our pajamas all day and fought over the remote.
Nick and I went to the new Bickfords today and had breakfast at six o'clock at night, then drove around, went to Kmart, where we ran into Jeremy and Joel, then went to drop my rent off to a landlord who is never home. I don't trust her enough to leave three hundred dollars in her mailbox. She'd screw me over in a heartbeat.
Back to work tomorrow. They've been warning me that January 2nd is the worst day of the year, since it's so busy. I'm not that excited, partly because I've run extremely low on clothes this last week and I only have four dollars to last me until next Thursday. I owe my parents two hundred dollars since I neglected to pay them their customary hundred dollars a week that I have been paying them, due to the holiday season. I was supposed to go up and go over my checkbook with her. I'm so tired of having to be financially responsible to someone other than myself. It's like that stupid checkbook is my last tie to being a child and I get so frustrated. I would so much rather just shutting down that account and getting my own checking account at another bank, one where my mother will never be able to make me feel like shit for bouncing a check, like it's some immoral thing and that I'm headed straight to hell. I just want to be in charge of my own life and I'm not anymore. I'm just being pushed around. Not caring which way I'm going.
We all made resolutions last night and mine was to be more positive. Of course, that was only one. I've got all sorts of little ones to do, like to become financially independant, get up early in the morning and take Penny for nice long walks, eat less red meat, write in my blog more, take my medication, watch less TV...and so on.
I just want to be perfect...is that so wrong?

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